I am finally home after a 12 hour bus journey and the journey was spent with me being in three different moods in the three parts of the journey...
Part 1: Prince Charming and his Former Princess
I was nearly crying and heavy at heart because I realised that he is still the Prince Charming, it is just that I am not the Princess anymore. How I miss that boy and his smile. He could light up my entire universe! I keep trying to tell him to hang on but he is moving on and I don't have the right to stop him.
'I think about you now and then... I think about us now and then... hey I'm coming home again..'
I really am... Just wait for a few months more...
Part 2: Rachita's Post
The second part of the journey was spent thinking about Rachita's latest post which is called SC.
The post is just so heartwarming. I mean someone gets a girl Chilly Peppers and tells her I've got the hots for you... here I go again.. awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww...
That is what I like about men... when they are in the zone they know exactly how to melt our lil hearts... sigh... :D
And the last ending line of the post which talked about 'letting the person know how you feel so that you never regret later' was exactly what I believe in. My thought is that I have an opportunity to tell someone that they are missed and that every morning there is someone loving them and praying for them, then why shouldn't I?
I can deal with no response but I cant deal with the fact that my someone didn't know that I cared. Of course I do end up looking very silly at times... And at times when I am in my weaker phases I feel sad. But all in all I am fine and happy.
I had the good times... they'll come again. :D
Part 3: Memories
The third part was an off shoot of what Rachita was talking about. And I started reminiscing about all the times boys who've cared about me have done crazy or plain simple mushy things for me.
I remembered how P, the day he'd asked me out had been circling my house in his car from 630 in the evening till 1130 in the night, waiting for me to be free to meet him because I was working on some competition. He had then taken me out for a looong drive and had eventually over a plate of hot Poha and tea asked me out. He was my first love. And my forever best friend. He's my lazy knight in shining armour who is an alcohol guzzling-woman loving-bear! :D
The number of scams he's pulled on me are just not countable anymore. He once convinced me that one of his friends was adopted and then promptly forgot that he had said something like this to me. A year later when I casually asked him about it his reaction was "Khadu is ADOPTED"
Me: You told me he's adopted!
Him: ummm... Was I scamming you? I am confused.
Sigh... :D And this conversation continued.
I remembered how R had asked me out at 3 in the morning over the phone (because I was super impatient and wanted to know right then what it is that he had to say) while I was in mussoorie. I state that that was the most romantic 'asking out' in the history of asking outs!!
And he'd come to meet me the moment I was back and while I was waiting had gone all over his area looking for Beer because he had promised that we'll have some when I met him! I still am not sure where he got the bottles considering all shops were closed that day.. He was my Superman!
I also remembered how my crazy LOTR loving R had gifted me a huge silver LOTR style ring which till date hasn't left my finger. It is now a reminder for me of all the good times that I had had and a hope that there will be more someday.
And of course the best memory of all is when after I'd thrown a chotu tantrum for some silly reason, R had gone out and bought me the Essential Johnny Cash CD and slipped it into my bag.... He always just knew what to do.
He knew that he just had to smile when I was angry and all would be well again in my land..
Ohh there's more... He had also once scared the crap out of me by impersonating a crazy fanatic! He kept following me around and saying weird things in high pitched voice till I was so scared that he had to stop!
Hehe... Initially when we had started dating no one knew about us but still he used to come to drop me back. And one day my Dad was waiting for me right outside my house and he saw us! I swear even I thought my gentle Dad might shoot him. R definitely thought that :D
Memories are what is left of those days and I keep them in my heart at all times. To remind me that there is always hope. That there is love and people who believe in them.
If only... No.. today isn't the day for 'if only's'. Today I will look at the bright side.
Today I will let the memories take me to a better place.
Tomorrow I'll be stronger and face the reality. :)
And finally my bus was in Hyderabad and I was struggling with my bag which sadly was stuck in the aisle
Did I ever tell you guys that I always fall in buses? Like in the aisle. I go splat!! :D