Monday, 3 December 2012

Him and Her


He was an alpha achiever. Smart. Good looking. Successful. All at the age of 27.
She was ambitious. Pretty. A smile that everyone raved about. With potential to be successful. And 24.

They made quite the couple – everyone said. At least everyone who knew they were dating.

He was admired and envied. And she was fun to talk to – always striking up conversations with strangers. They were both out to change the world. Together – it seemed.

She was sentimental. She loved taking care of him… Pandering to his whims… Celebrating his successes... Always ready to bend her stubbornness to make him smile. She wasn’t easy - Of course not.  She could be moody – at times like a dark grey cloud hovering over him. But still she tried. And it seemed he was happy. Didn’t he say so every day?

He was out to make her happy. He dropped her to work. Picked her up after work. He planned trips out of town with her. After all she loved traveling just as much as he did. He was attempting to be monogamous. She was appreciative of it. ‘I mean how many men can manage that in today’s times’, she told herself.

‘As long as he is honest’, she repeated in her head. ‘As long as he is honest…’

They were the golden couple. Her friends loved him. His friends were fond of her.
But then… why did he have this distant longing in his eyes? A longing for what… Friends? Or was he looking for companionship? Was she not proving to be a good companion? She rejoiced in his every success. And supported his every decision. They loved traveling and participated in each other’s interests.

So then... Why? Why could she not shake that feeling that this wasn’t enough for him? That somewhere he had come to believe that the right thing to do was to be by her but in reality he felt so far away.

She had decided not to snoop. She had sworn to herself that she will stop. But today she couldn’t. She had woken up with a horrible feeling. A feeling of confusion. A feeling she was not able to shake off.

He went for a shower. They were planning to go out into town. Grab a couple of beers. ‘It is a date’, he said and she was excited. They were so used to chilling together that dates weren’t really something they went for.

He went for a shower and she went for his phone.

Private messages.
**** she typed in the password. It seemed easy. Maybe he wanted her to be able to open it.
There it was.
At first she couldn’t sense anything wrong.
And then she felt it. She figured who she was.
That beautiful innocent girl. The one who would advise him not to drink so much.
‘Him: I miss you btw
Her: I miss you too.

It felt like a weight had been lifted. She had finally found the answer.
 He was unhappy. Maybe not unhappy. But definitely not content. He wasn't looking for a friend. He was looking for a companion.
She realized then that she had dragged him too far. And without knowing she had cut him off from finding that companion. Who was she to ask him to pick her. Who was she to make him feel like he had wronged her. How had she managed to manipulate him like that. They had never really had a real relationship. The Girl had always been around. The Girl was equally entitled to his affections. And she had dragged him away.

‘How far can we go to keep this up while you lose out on finding the real ‘one’ for you?’, she wondered.

She should have left of course. Let him lose. But she couldn't do it today. She needed him to accept his desire to find a companion, before she left. So that he didn't repeat the cycle again. The cycle of living in denial.

He needed saving. She just needed his love for a little longer.

They went and drank those beers.
And suddenly there were two people with distant dark eyes.

2 comments:

Nikita Banerjee Bhagat said...

Stark. I loved this post. Very practical. Sad but true for many!

Trishaela Nair said...

Wow!